And also, the queen who carries the baby in her tummy.
Just saw my doctor today, Sweetie accompanied me. My tummy still hardens and aches, and mee oh my oh, this is really a tough pregnancy. Confined to the bed, yes I am. Prisoner of my own house, of my own parents, of my own world, of my own life. I'm so fuckin' depressed again... well, not that depressed anymore but still... I am.
Milestones for the day: None. Save for some cuddling and smoochfest with the sweetheart and the shocking news...a friend was just abandoned (is this the correct term?) by her husband, and I can't help but cry. This is not over reacting, as Sweetie insisted, but more of being sympathetic. I just can't imagine her being left by her hubby with their two lovely daughters. I cried because I felt her pain (hey, I'm a woman too!) and I just thought that "What if it happened to me?". Good God, I cannot bear the thought, so I shunned it away. Sweetie might have sensed it, so he assured me. Lots of hugs and kisses. Lots of tickles. But not enough to really shun the bad feeling away.
I feel bad and sorry for that friend. We never had the chance to talk a lot and bond together while I was still at my previous job, but she's such a sweet and nice lady and I'm just very thankful to have her around. Maybe, this is the chance to finally reach out and talk about things. She's one of the kindest people I know, and she doesn't deserve to be treated this way! Not by anyone, not even her husband. As a woman, I know the hurts and the pains of being turned away by the one you love the most (and the one who loved you the most). How many times did I have that feeling? The pain, the misery, the heavy emotions deep down that scar your soul. I never wanted to venture into that dimension anymore. And I don't want any of the people close to me to wander into that, too.
But you cannot prevent what happens to you, or the people around you. Call it destiny, fate or karma... but that is what life is made of.
The only way to fight is to be strong. Acknowledge your weakness and move on.
Seize the day, for tomorrow, we die.
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